6 Months Memorial

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Dear friends, this week we celebrate six months since Lynette's death and transition into the presence of our Lord.  They have been six good though at times very challenging months.  I would again like to express my deep gratitude to each of you who have prayed for us and supported us in different ways during this time.

People often ask how the children are doing and I must still say that I am surprised at how well they seem to be doing.  They do not seem in any way traumatize or damaged.  They have the normal challenges and difficulties of young children but they are happy and well adjusted.  Tristan continues to struggle with some aspects of school as he has always done, especially his reading and spelling.  Katherine is doing very well in school and enjoys it very much.  I have become more aware in recent weeks of my limitations as a single parent.  I think I am doing well in caring for the children in meeting their basic needs, but I feel very inadequate to add those special touches which make life interesting and fun.  I am trying very hard to organize my schedule to be with the children after school and on weekends and we enjoy our time together.  I am very grateful for the excellent support we have, especially from our missionary community here.  The children have a number of close friends that they love spending time with.  I have a great deal of flexibility on occasions when my responsibilities require me to be away from the children.  There are always people who are willing to watch the children and they are delighted to be with their friends.

My own grieving process continues to progress.  There are still many sad and poignant moments but in general I am finding that the sharp pain of Lynette's loss is being replaced by a deep gratitude for the time that I had with her.  A picture of us together hangs on my wall, and it no longer brings tears to my eyes to look at it.  I remember the joy of the event with her.

I spent several hours a few days ago looking through the files on her laptop computer for the first time.  (The computer had needed repair and has just recently been returned to me) I felt her presence very strongly as I read different talks she had prepared and letters she had written, but that presence brought pleasure not pain.  I know that grieving has its seasons and the sharper pains will probably return but I am grateful for the current stage.  Please keep praying for us as the journey is not over yet.

I have begun the process of preparing the permanent marker for Lynette's grave.  In Albania this is traditionally a large stone slab which is placed over the grave approximately 1 year after the burial.  I have wanted to make this something special which would be a witness to her life and faith.

Lynette always loved mosaics and had wanted to learn this art for many years.  She planned to begin studying it if the Lord had granted her healing from her cancer.  She enjoyed a close friendship with a very talented mosaic artist here who has done numerous pieces for the churches around Albania.  I have commissioned this artist whose name is Edward to do a mosaic of the resurrection and one of St. Katharine for Lynette's grave.  He is very excited about this project and is enthusiastic about doing something which will be a real tribute to Lynette.

We suffered a major disappointment this month when we were informed by the board of the school where the children attend that they will not recognize us as fellow missionaries.  The school is organized jointly by several Protestant missionary organizations.  The mission of the school is to serve the Protestant missionary community.  Non-missionaries pay about 2 1/2 times the tuition of missionaries.  I had petitioned the board to be recognized as a fellow missionary both because I believe it is important for all of those who are serving Christ here in Albania to recognize and support one another and because the additional cost of the non-missionary tuition is very substantial.  After two meetings with members of the board I believed that we had come to a mutual positive understanding, but then I received a letter from them informing me that they were resolved to maintain their policy of treating Orthodox missionaries as non-missionaries.  I have been deeply saddened by this decision.

I will resume teaching patrology at the resurrection of Christ theological Academy after Easter.  Deacon Hector who had been teaching these classes in my absence will be returning to the United States for the birth of their baby.  I am looking forward to being back in the classroom and in daily contact with the Church fathers but I am wondering where I will find the time.  It has been a real challenge to restrict my working hours in order to make sufficient quality time with the children.  There are many challenging and exciting things happening with the children's and university ministries for which I am responsible as well as many other areas.  I am increasingly convinced that the most important area of ministry is investing in the development of people.  I am very blessed with an excellent staff of coworkers: please pray that I will be able to inspire and lead them well.  I have and will be doing a fair amount of speaking at a variety of events on various topics.  These include: training events for my staff and volunteers, the girls Winter Camp, the Tirana women's group weekly meetings and a conference for the diocese they are organizing, two weekly Bible studies, regular talks at the University weekly meetings. These opportunities are both a joy and a great responsibility.  I ask your prayers that I will inspire those to whom I speak to draw closer to Christ and live life more fully in him.

I want to close by thanking each of you who have supported us financially and in prayer.  I apologize that you have not received individual thank you notes.  This was something that Lynette had always done and I have not yet been able to do.